When I look at the mirror, I feel like I don't know who the person in the reflection is.

When I'm lonely, I think of my dad. =(

I want to hug my mom. So badly. But I can't. =(
For certain reasons. Mental and physical.

Kasi ma-epal kung random stuff.

Kawawa ka naman kung pina-badtrip mo ako certain days ago. Mam-bi-bitch ako ngayon.

What you lack in talent, make up for perseverance.

echoed through my mind all throughout logic class.

so what i lack in the talent of memorization, i will make up for fucking perseverance.

gusto ko i-untog ang ulo ko sa pader for being so stupid!! when God spread emotional intelligence in the world, i was off bragging that i got a doctor for a mother.

We all have weak moments. But how come all i have are weak moments?

I will update my friendster proile... I want a copy of my old 'About Me' somewhere, so I'll put it here.

*Mae Lisette Jaurigue Pang loves talking about herself in the Third Person.

*She was born on the 18th of September, in the year of the Lord MCMLXXXIX. It is also credited as the year Tim Berners-Lee invented the World Wide Web.

*She is currently taking up AB Philosophy at the University of Santo Tomas.

*The most common first impression of her is serious, and people find it amusing that she is not at all.
*She is often thought of as suplada, but no, she is kind... and compassionate!

*She loves stars and the colors black, pink, silver, and green.
*Uber moody.
*Conceited.
*Terrible at maintenance.
*Obsessive compulsive.
*Has manic depressive tendencies.
*Overcompetitive.
*Maldita, as described by most of her blockmates.
*Does what is right and proper most of the time.
*She hates doing menial tasks and extrenous activities, which explains her sedentary-ness. And her love for doing things mentally. But she does try sports once in a while to break from the monotony.
*She is afraid of constancy and routine.
*Traditional middle child: rebellious, manipulative, and in constant need of attention.
*Stalker extraordinaire.
*Control freak.
*Beware of the mood swings.
*Lacks self confidence.
*Sweet.
*Thoughtful.
*Corny.
*Loves movies.

*Current obsessions: Friedrich Nietzsche. Grey's Anatomy. UST Central Library. The Second Semester. English 101B, Lit102, Logic, CWG, Thy2, Math101, Phl 202, and PHILIPPINE GOVERNMENT AND CONSTITUTION, also known as PGC.

*Her greatest dream is to someday be able to talk about everything under the sun and the sea.
*She wants to be called profound someday, not just smart. Ahaha. Dream on. =)

*Whatever your dream is, it is God's plan for you*

Make me happy!!!

Problem is, I don't know what to replace it with.

*I'm in a computer shop, and I know that other people need to use the pc badly. But today, I'm in such a bad mood (heard 'tig-tres' as 'depress' and other what-nots.) And I'mma let it all out. And I don't care if you dedicate an entry to my bitching cause you're bitchier than me, and I only express it once! I'm just following my Master Niccolo's advice: Do all adversaries at once, and not little by little.

Eto na! (Excited ako!)

*feeling mo ang galing-galing mo. ang ingay-ingay mo. duh, like i want and need to hear what you are saying. I DON'T NEED TO. THEY'RE ALL SHIT. and i don't need no shit in my brain! i hate the way you invade me, so much. i ain't happy at all when i feel your presence. it beats the hell out of me. all you say about people are bad stuff, and honestly, wala ka namang maipagmamalaki. alam ko wala akong maipagmamalaki, but i don't bitch people the way you do, cause you do it every single second, minute, hour of your inferior existence.

*eto lang. shut up. ayoko marinig yan *****&^^%^%& stories mo. kasi tingin ko imposible yun. nonetheless, love pa rin kita. =)

*ikaw din. shut up. buti nag-lessen na, pero nakakainis pa rin eh.

[ASIDE: BAKIT PALA AKO IRITABLE SA MAIINGAY NA TAO?]

*prof 'to. nakakainis. pag TAMAD ang prof, nagpapa-report. tamad ka na nga, wala pa akong natututunan sa'yo. bobo na nga ako, mas bobobo pa ako dahil sa pinaggagagawa mo sa amin. yan tuloy, ang daming nag-drop ng subject mo. prof ka, may authority ka, but respect is earned, not ...  (or whatever that quote is, it slipped from my effin' poor memory), i mean you get respect from the things that you do, you don't simply obtain it cause you're a professor or a person of authority.

*eto. past na kita. kaya shut up. waaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!.

*nainggit lang ako. sorry. pero love din kita.

um, tapos na ako.

supposed to go to qc for concilum philosophiae today but backed out. *walang pera*

pasko na. bakit walang pera?

bakit may nananakawan ng pera?
(sagot: TANGA)

ewan ko. tanga talaga ako.

pero di ako nananakawan ng pera.

i decided to have my hair cut.

yun lang.

*terminate entry*

tinatamad na ako gumawa ng additional stuff.

There are times when I’m lying in my bed
Hug my pillow and cry from this tip again
And my eyes are like windshields on a rainy day
Almost rubbed down, swelling, as I keep on
Dipping my face in these cold hands of mine
Heaven knows how bitter I am

Chorus
‘Cause this angel has flown away from me
Leaving me in drunken misery
I should have clipped her wings and made her mine
For all eternity
Now this angel has flown away from me
Thought I had the strength to set her free
Did what I did because I love her so
Will she ever find her way back home to me
Aah…

I’m so tired, I feel like catching forty winks
Being up all night in this elbow room
That puts me in a trance
Where hopes and dreams come true
Now my lips are burning and my eyes are hurting
From this fuse I mixed till I light another
Cigarette just to pass my time, oh
Heaven knows how bitter I am

(Repeat chorus) 

Please thank God for all your blessings. =)

God has given me a miracle. He gave me a time-out from all the stress. It's true. God won't give you a problem you can't solve.

Wala lang. kasi i'm so glad that there are no classes, I have time to catch up with all my PGC readings.

Readings I haven't read:
-Philippine Bill of 1902
-Philippine Consti
-Tydings McDuffie
-another document which name I do not know

Theology report= half done
Immanuel Kant= powerpoint presentation and analyzation of core philosophies


Bangs rock.
Last Tuesday I had my hair cut. Shoulder length layered with BANGS. It's been seven years since I last had bangs. Sorry, no pix yet, Haven't gone to the Bluetooth station.

PS The GUY (I insist!) who cut my hair was wafu. He's a guy, I insist!

LET GO.
I'm letting go of you. I give up.
And then the fucking txt message.

kung magmamahal
ako sana ikaw na lang



pero matimbang
ang pagiging
magkaibigan,



kaya pinili kong
maging ganun
na lang





hindi dahil hindi kita mahal,





kung hindi mas pinili ko
kung saan tayo...






magtatagal. =)


oh shit.
maganda na sana, may smiley face lang!!! grr.

11.14.06
the topic lumen gentium was tasked to be reported. powerpoint presentation to be passed on 11.28.06 in cd format.

11.22.06
the quest for lumen gentium begins. the hunt was almost successful, except that the book was not allowed for check-out.

11.23.06
the document was found in the ecclesistical library and photocopied. put away for future (ehem...) use.

11.26.06
two days 'til deadline.

what have i done?

NOTHING.

Second sem, so far, is fun. Our profs are diligent, which makes the students share the same enthusiasm.

Let's start with PGC [Philippine Government and Constitution], because I enjoy this subject very much.

Shet, terror. First day. The first thing I noticed about the prof was her pretty orange/ brown dress with a belt. It was a dress picked with good taste, except that it had a .25 thick belt. Of course the eyes will move toward the belt. Wrong move.
I didn't want to make eye contact with her, as I thought I'd melt in my seat. You know that feeling, that when a person looks at you, you'd want to melt in fear?
Assignment: Treaty of Paris.
Second meeting. The night before, I spent two hours reading and rereading the Treaty of Paris, underlining the main points and making notes. That's what a student does when he/she is afraid of a prof, right? I was so shocked because she became gentler. I love her now. and I've done her advance assignment. [philippine bill of 1902]

English 101B. Communication Skills in English II.

Danzel (a friend from Sociology) said that this prof does not give boys a failing grade. Since I hated English 101A [I got a 1.00 prelim grade and a 1.75 grade from my Eng101A prof with no effort at all since all she taught was crap] i thought I might hate Eng101B too. But nooooooooooo. It was only the first meeting and I've already learned a lot, from the difference of a few and few, little and a little, etc. I love it. I love the prof. I also love his name. And how he teaches. And how he's so great.

Phl2. Logic.

I wanted to roll in laughter. He gave chocolate to everyone who was able to give the correct answer. What was that, kindergarten class? Kulang na lang sticker at stamp na may star at Very Good!!!
Translate this: I do not dislike you.
Anak ng tetkwa!*
I LIKE YOU!
Siyempre sa pretty girl niya pina-translate.
Be happy, because they gave you the best. Yeah right. I still think Dr Co is the best there is. Where can you find a prof who dances on the platform, entertains his audience, and lies on the table, teaches the degrees of aesthetics?
Despite all the chocolate giving, I'll enjoy this class. Waha. Tama ang mga sagot ko. Whee!

Lit102. Filipino Literature in English.

You know that feeling, when you're in a class and you feel like you're watching a comedy show? I was so shocked when our prof suddenly crossed her eyes. Disturbing. Haha.
But since I like reading Filipino Lit [hail hail Nick Joaquin, Carlos Bulosan, NVM Gonzales, Bienvenido Santos, Jose Garcia Villa, Lualhati Bautista] and the teacher's fun, if I don't get a grade in the line of 1, I'm going to regret this forever.

CWG. Contemporary World Geography.

Eto naman, parang talk show. Buti sana kung PGC 'to eh, maiintindihan ko pa kung bakit natin pinag-uusapan ang dalawang senador na nagsuntukan.

Math 101.

Sets. Tapos di ko pa masagutan. Line of 9 pa naman Math ko buong first year. Yun nga palang libro ko nung first year ay binigay ko kay RR. Tapos yung notebooks ko may humiram. Tsktsk.

Phl 202. Western Philosophy.

Reporting na naman?!?! Sawa na ako sa reporting, di naman ako nakikinig. Dahil sa reporting, tres ang grado ko sa Eastern Philosophy [dapat kasi tinuturo yang Yoga, Brahman, Atman, Vedanta, Nyaya, Charvaka, Lokayata, Vaishesika na yan eh!]
Pero ayos pa rin. Makikipagkaibigan na kami kina Socrates, Plato, Aristotle, St. Thomas, St. Albert, St. Augustine, Immanuel Kant, Karl Marx, Rene Descartes, Sigmund Freud, at... FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE!

sabi ko na nga ba.

*lagi kang nasa dorm mo.
*nung monday, humihingi ako ng favor na magpasama sa sm, sabi mo darating tita mo. [aian, dito na ako nagduda. alam ko nang mag-eenroll ka]

pakshet, mehn!

nung tuesday night, pinababa ako sa dorm. alam ko namang pumasok siya at nag-enroll. langya. sabi ba naman eh uuwi na siya ng probinsya niya, bumisita lang siya. magpapaalam daw. sige lang. sure. ayaw ko talaga maniwala sa sinasabi niya. kasi ilang beses na niya ako pinagtataguan ng mga ganun. haha. hindi naman ako makapagsalita, kasi baka magalit lang ako sa kanya. ai, basta, masaya ako. nag-enroll pa rin siya.

basta pinuntahan niya pa ako para sabihing nag-enroll siya. dapat masaya na ako di ba?

medyo lang.